The Raft

My daughter loves her babies. Loves them. All of them. She has about 25 dolls.

I am not kidding, there might be more than 25 depending on what classifies it as a doll.
She has dolls that were mine growing up that Grammy sent home with her (or Granbear packed in a box and forced us to take). She has Cabbage Patch Dolls and "Baby Born", she has dolls that cost $3.99 in Target that have those mouths that are always open, waiting for the little, plastic pacifier to get stuck back in.
She has this one doll - it was $10 in Babies R Us and she had just gotten about 4 new dolls because Wyatt was just born. But she carried that doll around with her, all through Babies R Us, in the box, loving her and talking to her and stroking her.
What choice did I have?
She named her "Cute Baby" and she still loves her.

She has "Heavy Baby" and "Big Baby" along with "Cute Baby". She also has a few pretty ugly dolls that Jay's gramma made - maybe for decoration? But no one could tell Abby that one doll is better than another, she adores them all.

When Wyatt was nursing, Abby would lift her little shirt up, exposing that precious little belly, and feed her babies, too.
She asks me for wipes to clean her babies - and she does it, face then hands.
She tucks them in with blankets and tells us "sssh - my baby is having a nappie".
She feeds them with a spoon, or a bottle. She tells them they are cute and that she loves them. She hugs them and kisses them and dances around the room asking "you like that baby? you like dancing?"
It is the most magical, adorable, magnificent thing ever.

By 4:30, 5pm I am about done with my day. Taking care of 2 non-stop kids is exhausting. It may not be brain surgery but it is tiring!
I usually get a second wind that gets me through dinner and a bath but by the time it is bedtime, mommy is done.
And by now, it's 10:30pm, I am already remembering my day fondly and looking forward to tomorrow.

Abby asked me today "what, mama? why you laughing?"
I didn't know why, it was something she said or did but I didn't know how to explain that, exactly so I just said "because I am happy."
She replied with the standard "why?"
And I just said "because I love my life, baby girl."

The look on her face was so precious. I thought I really touched her, she was staring at me in such a way. Then I realized they "way" was frustration, she just looked at me and said "mommy! I am not a baby! I am a big girl! Wyatt is a baby!"

I really do love my life.