Weening myself off of Facebook.
Sort of.
I don't intend to "quit it" but I have become a bit too addicted to it.
I am no longer "searching" now I am just straight up "stalking".  I mean, really.  250+ friends on FB.  Do I have nothing else to do but check and see if they're eating, going out or too tired but can't sleep?

Scored a gorgeous, handmade, solid and practically scratch-free bookshelf at a flea market yesterday.  
 $25.
Pledged it, threw our books on it and called it our Hallway Piece.
I love flea markets and tag sales but I rarely go because a) they're early in the day and I hate that and b) it's hard to bring kids along.
This bookshelf made my year.
The bookshelf that was in our hallway was $70 from Staples.  Much bigger but particle board and plastic - nothing compared to what we have now.
We put the Staples thing in our living room for lack of a better place, thinking it would stick out like a sore thumb but it really looks good.
The "wood" color matches the rocking chair which is right next to it and it really blends right in.
Love it.

Summer is fading into Fall.
I still need to sleep with the fan on in my window, but I wake up chilly.  Not quite "need a sweatshirt until my coffee warms me up" chilly but still - I'm not sweating.
I love the hum of the fan.  I hate when that season ends and I have to find a new way to fall asleep.  I like the white noise hum of my kids' monitors on my night stand - so I guess that will fall back into place as my standard sleep inducer.

I have mums in my yard.  But my impatiens are still colorful.  That is a sure sign of the end of summer.  I love mums so much, I start to buy them as soon as the stores put them out and I really don't stop...  really.  I think I had about 22 of them - all sizes and colors one year.  That was the year we had Abby's baptism - ironically the same date that Wyatt would be born a year later - so the mums and 50 million pumpkins and corn stalks became my obsession.  We're always hosting a lot this time of year - so why not, right?


Jaybor Day is next weekend and the 10-Day forecast is calling for a sunny, mid-low 70's sort of week.  Great weather for Fall but not very "pool friendly".  These cold nights and yesterday's rain storm have dropped the pool temp back to the low 70's.  Combined with 70 degree days, that makes for one COLD pool!  Even for us Northerners!
It's really down to only a matter of days before we close her up and look down a the black cover instead of the crystal blue water.  That makes me a little sad.

But it also revs me up.  I have been so sad about the end of this summer.  It was a great one.  Now my kid goes to school, I have Q&K 5 days a week after school, Debbie (my BGF) is back to work and the routine has returned.
Today, after mourning the imminent pool closure, I had an epiphany.
This is my favorite season.  My best time of year.  Why am I not enjoying it?!
I love mums, pumpkins, chilly mornings and hosting parties.  This is my season!
So - bring it on!  And after this we have Thanksgiving and Christmas, then Abby's birthday in January and then lovely nothing-ness.
Then, it all starts over again!  Spring clean up and planting, Summer beach days and pool nights and Fall!!

God!  I love New England and how beautifully You have blessed us with four fabulous seasons!

I am a little bummed that my amazing tan is fading, though.  Today I noticed my coffee stain birthmark on my leg for the first time in months...  it blends into my tan.  Now it's back.  Darn it.


So, with Fall on the verge of full display I have to find a new Lawn Guy.  Our previous "landscaper", if you will, missed us completely one fall and again this past Spring so I kindly requested he remove our name from his list.
Now, I have to find someone else.
I could do it myself.  Sure.  But having it done ensures it gets done, all in one swoop, for one price.  Gardens are clear, borders are respected, piles are carried deep into the woods.  And it takes a professional a few hours.  It would take me, and my rake, several days.  And it still wouldn't look as good.
So - let the hunt begin...

So, today was the Big Day!

Part I

Abby was up at 6:30, a full hour earlier than usual, which was great but unexpected. She was very excited. She bounced in our room and said "is this a good time for waking up for school, mama?"
It was.
We snuggled, she drank her warm milk, I drank my coffee.
Then, I got dressed. Then, she got dressed.
Then Wyatt woke up and drank his warm milk and we got him dressed.

At about 7:30 I was serving up "anything" Abby wanted for breakfast. She chose Eggos. A girl after my own heart.


The 4 of us loaded into the car and off we went.

It was only about 8:18 but I know it takes 6 minutes door-to-door (including car seats) and I didn't know what the parking lot would be like with all the drop-offs.
We made it there without issue, parked and headed over to our drop-off area.


We took a few pics, talked to a few parents and then Abby's teacher came out to get the kids lined up and ready to head in.

Without a second thought my big girl handed Lambie over and lined up. She wouldn't have even kissed us if we hadn't reminded her!
I guess she'll be fine!

There was one little guy who really lost it as his Daddy left him. He was a mess of blonde curls, snot and tears. And seeing him made me lose my composure a bit. I wanted to snuggle him.
I'm sure he'll be fine, too.

Wyatt was visibly confused when we loaded back into the car without Abby.
I cried on the way home. And as I write this, I feel a bit lost with just one kid. But, I have laundry to fold and like I said, I look forward to playing with Wywy.
And there is only 2 hours, 32 minutes till pick up!

PART II

After a few hours of not knowing what to do with ourselves, we packed up and headed out to pick Abby up.
Once again, the parking lot was a zoo but we parked far away from the school knowing that the less we had to deal with the other maniacs trying to park as close as possible on the way in, the less we'd have to deal with them on the way out.

We only waited about one minute before the kids filed out.
The teacher let them out one at a time as the parents showed themselves for a safe release.
We barely showed ourselves but Wyatt spotted Abby and went screaming towards her so we were spotted.

We chatted with a few other parents for a few minutes and I couldn't help but look back at 2 kids - both gorgeous, one boy and one girl - who were still waiting. Now, mind you, it was probably 11:22 and pick up is 11:20 so these parents aren't delinquent in any way. But the faces on these kids as they looked out into this sea of parents and preschoolers with no sign of their own mommy or daddy was heartbreaking.

Heart. Breaking.

I swore right then and there that I would NEVER be late for preschool pick-up.
(No such promises for drop-off!)

We got home and Abby regaled us with tales of circle time, snack time and using the tiny potty again. Other than that, she didn't have much to say and her grump level was rising.
We ate lunch and put Wyatt down for his nap. I got Abby into my bed for some "first day of school - big girl - snuggling" and she conked out right quick.

So, I am making some sauce for a simple pasta dinner and letting my two babes sleep off their very exciting morning.

Now, I will warm up a cup of coffee and prepare for Part III of this day... Quinn & Kieran!

Today was Abby's Open House.
We went to her classroom, met her teacher, used the teeny-tiny potty and figured out where to park and where Pick-Up/Drop-Off is.

I took this official picture because tomorrow is the first actual day of school, but it starts at 8:30, so who knows if we'll have time to do this tomorrow!! I barely got us there for 10:00!

Is it just me, or does that school just look HUGE?

Here is Miss Thing in her classroom.

Yes, those are pink Converse high-tops.
Yes, she picked them out at the store and this morning to go with her dress.

I didn't take a lot of pictures because I didn't know "the rules" about that sort of thing.
She has her own hook for her "jacka" and backpack as well as a "mailbox" where I retrieved some very important papers as the mama of the preschooler!

Abby's teacher and I agreed that Lambie could come to school, in her backpack, the first few days - just until Abby agrees that Lambie would prefer to wait in the car.

The mailbox & hooks right next to her's belongs to a little girl who's mom I met and hit it off with right away. The mom is the sister of the 2 young women (older than girls but not quite "woman") that work in our pediatrician's office. We love them and I am so glad that their niece is in Abby's class!)

I have a lump in my throat & chest that can't be described as any one emotion - but it is definitely a big one. My little baby girl... school... by herself...

But - she is so excited and I know that she'll love it and be awesome and just explode into herself, so that keeps me happy. :)

That, and the QT that Wywy and I will have 4 mornings a week.

So, earlier tonight, I was thinking about how many very good friends I have in my life.
That got me thinking about how much I love them, love being with them, love their kids...

I like people pretty easily but I don't fall in love with or trust people very easily. I try to hide my insecurities and general goofiness until I am sure of my safety with people.

That got me thinking about how blessed I feel for knowing that I, too, am loved. That my kids are loved. That my family is loved, respected, enjoyed - as we love, respect and enjoy our friends, as well.

That led to thinking about my family. Growing up the youngest of four, I was always very well taken care of. (Yes, and sometimes just getting beat on by 3 older siblings, or over-protected or dumped on - it comes with the package, and the package was well worth it!)
I love my family so much. I am so lucky to have a close relationship with my 2 sisters and brother - and their spouses. Distance doesn't put space between us, and even when a lot of time goes between talks, it doesn't leave a gap in the conversation.

It made me realize that while I do, at times, feel sad for something that is going on with my family or friends. I am grateful for the sadness - because it forces me use my strength that gets me past it. And that strength comes from my heart, my ability to forgive and forget, my desire to love and be loved, my need for peace and never to hold hostility.

I prefer to see the good in people.
I prefer to assume good intentions.
I would rather be disappointed than to just not expect anything at all.

Sometimes, I am disappointed.
Today I was.

But you know what? It won't hurt forever, and at least my disappointment is not with myself, my effort or my heart.

It's hard to explain, so I decided to, once again, Google some quotes to try to capture what I am feeling.
I couldn't find just one, so I thought I would share the few that stuck with me.

"In a full heart there is room for everything,
and in an empty heart there is room for nothing."


"Have a heart that never hardens,
a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts."


"The less you open your heart to others, the more your heart suffers."


"There is no instinct like that of the heart."


"To the world you might be one person,
but to one person you might be the world."

Before:
After:

A little closer - before:
After:
I think I've earned a night out with my BGF:

"I have always despised
the whining yelp of complaint
and cowardly resolve."

-Robert Burns,
Scottish Poet known as the Bard of Ayrshire

I found this quote when I Googled "Passive Aggressive Quotes". I Googled "Passive Aggressive Quotes" because I have been playing this Passive Aggressive Game with a certain Facebooker for the past few days.
I have no idea if this person reads my Blog. I doubt it. I doubt it because it is not about this person. And this person tends not to want anything to do with anything that is not about them.

Normally, I don't deal in "passive anything". And I very rarely deal with "aggressive" at all, either. I have been known to show a lot of strength when defending those that I feel need my strength or defense, but I rarely show any of that courage for my own honor or reputation. I truly don't have the energy. And sometimes I fear what I might lose if I were to scream, yell or lose my cool in some situations.

So, even when I am very tempted to finally speak in a voice that would show my anger, my hurt, my resentment - I squash it.

My Heart is Full.
But lately, it aches.

Never miss an opportunity to make others happy,

even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it.


~Author Unknown

I moderate comments on posts older than 7 days.
I only do it so that I know someone commented on a post that I am probably not looking at anymore.
Plus - I get a little thrill when I see them waiting for me when I log into Blogger.

I am venturing out tonight. At first I was going out to dinner and for a pedi with Kimmie. That had to be postponed because one kid with 2 activities and another that still naps is kicking my ass this week and I can't get everything done.
Maybe I need a nanny...
Anyway - I am going to Big Y. I never go anywhere but Stop & Shop but tonight, I want to do my "chores" but make it a bit more interesting. I don't have to bring the kids, they'll be asleep, so I can take my time and check out a new shop.

I am using Clorox in my laundry again. Not like I once did, but every now and then you just need a little brightening and whitening, ya know?

Abby is taking ballet. It's just a 1-week intro class through our town's Parks & rec but it is so stinkin' cute to see her, and 4 other little dollies, in their leotards & slippers, hopping all over the gym.
And the class is in what will be her preschool in a few weeks, so we are all enjoying the "getting to know you" aspect of it.
I was able to peek into her classroom. It was everything I dreamed it would be. And it wasn't even set up yet.

I know this isn't a very exciting entry. I felt like I had more to day when I logged in, but I guess I didn't.
I am trying not to think this week. We should all take a break like that every now and then.

What did we do before Clorox Wipes? I balked at their "convenience" for a long time because how hard is it to spray and wipe?
Well, Balk No More!
They are BRILLIANT!
I cleaned Abby's dollhouse and playkitchen and both of the Ride-On toys in minutes. I know they're clean and germ-free and I only had to wipe (ok, in many areas, I needed a toothpick - EW) and then throw out the wipes and wash my hands. Done!
Now, I have to make them a staple, which means stocking up when they're on sale or buying at BJ's. Will have to price-compare.
I wonder if the Lysol ones are better or cheaper? What about store brands... let the research begin!!

No rain in the forecast. It hasn't rained yet this week and it's not supposed to for a few more days. I might actually be able to fertilize and water my gardens!! Saints Alive!

I fell. If you know me, you know I fall a lot and I spill often.
Last summer I slipped down the deck stairs while wearing $2.50 Old Navy Flip Flops and using the hose. Of course I fell. Even a non-faller is going to slip under those conditions.
I slipped all the way down the stairs, trying to catch myself on the banister and eventually landing on the concrete below.
I bruised my right leg into unbelievable colors and hurt my left leg, ankle and shin so badly I was certain it was all broken and smashed up under the skin.
I crawled back up, got in to the relatively chilly baby pool with Abby and called Jay to come home because I was pretty sure I had to go to the hospital.
I had never felt pain like that before. But I have also never broken any bones before.
I went to the Walk-In Medical Center in Marlborough. The doctor never x-rayed me, to my memory, but told me that while nothing was broken, that shin "is gonna hurt for a LONG time." He was not kidding. It is still sensitive, a year later.

And today, I fell out of my Porch Door into the Garage. I was stepping down so my feet went first but I stepped onto my rubber gardening clog, which rolled and sent me to my knees, crushing my left foot, 10 toes and both ankles (not sure how that makes sense but that's what hurts so...)
This time, I am sure I broke my pinky toe on my right foot. Jay is certain I did not. Either way, they would only tape me up and send me home so I skipped the Medical Center. Although, I do wonder if I could have walked out with some pain meds... oh well.
The top of my left foot (still not 100% from last year) is very swollen and bruised, my right toe is ridiculously painful and both ankles took a bad turn.
I'm a freakin' disaster.

Today at swimming lessons, the kids had their "barbells" and were learning how to kick while holding them, with no adult help.
My Abby, my sweet, precious, timid baby girl does NOT like to be let go in the water. She has never even liked floating in a boat in our pool with me not holding onto the boat. And even when she let me go under for a minute or swim around her, chasing diving sticks or whatever she throws for me, it doesn't last long. She is a very nervous girl.
Only physically, mind you.
She will talk to you about anything for as long as you can take it. She is not the least bit shy. She can hold a conversation better than many adults I know. She is polite and kind and friendly and fabulous.
But physically, she is just very cautious.

So, today, when "Teacher Kelly" was trying to tell her that she could do it and Abby gave it a few half-tries, she made her way in to the beach and up to our blanket.
In the first 2 weeks of swimming (aka - Level One) she never once left the water. She was very comfortable with her teacher, Joe, and with the water level - about knee deep.
This session, Level 2, is about belly-to-shoulder deep and a whole new ballgame for Miss Abby.
She sat down and I asked her what she was doing.

"My tummy hurts."
"Are you nervous about swimming with the barbells, babe?"
"OH! Goldfish!"
"You want some Goldfish and to sit here with mommy for a little bit until you feel better?"
"Yes, please."
"Ok."

When the barbell portion of swimming was over, she promptly put the Goldfish back in the beach bag and hopped to her feet.

"I'm feeling better, mama!"

Teach Kelly walked by (we sit right by the water, they walk by a lot) and said "Feeling better, Abby? Want to join us again?"

"SURE!"

And off she went!

So, tonight, when I was tucking her in, I asked her about her tummy ache at the beach.

"Abby, were you a bit nervous when you had to swim with the barbells today?"
"No, Mommy."
"You just wanted to sit with Mommy a little?"
"Yes. Because I was scared."
"Well, babe, anytime you feel scared,
you can always come and sit with Mommy, ok?"
"Thank You."

And that, my friends, is what being "mommy" is all about.

I love the sound of my kids running through the house on the hardwood floors.
I can't wait to replace the living room carpet with more wood for more pitter-patters... ok, more like thud-thuds... especially from the one who's feet are taller than they are wide. Often referred to as Barney Rubble.

The kids have decided they no longer need the child-safety cushions around the brick hearth of the fireplace. They have pulled them off and use them as swords.
As far as I can remember, neither child's head has ever been spared because I placed those cushions there, so let's hope it doesn't come up now that they're off!
It is nice to have the brick back completely.

Making Beer Bread right now. Kimmie made it one time and I haven't been able to get it right since. I am also making the "Garlic Dip" by Tastefully Simple that she paired with it. The bread is Pampered Chef, tho - wonder if that's the difference? How different can Beer Bread be?
Using Guinness, never fear, my friend!

Planning our "Non-Consecutive 5th Annual Jay-bor Day BBQ". Can't decide on decor. I might just skip that expense and concentrate on food & drinks.
Thinking about placing on the invitations "please bring a salad or side that you love" and that avoids everyone asking and the aggravation of prep and fridge-room.
I will make the main courses and appetizers, and of course - DESSERT!! Is that tacky?
My aunt did it one year and she said it was awesome - so many different sides and salads, and a great conversation starter for people.
We'll invite the family and our smallest circle of friends - because just that is about 35 people.
Inevitably, it becomes bigger because my big mouth invites everyone I run into between now and the actual party, but whatever - once you're doing it, you might as well do it, right?
{I promise I won't do it this time, babe, in case you're reading this!}

After Jay-bor Day comes Wyatt's birthday. I cannot decide between one more Sesame Party, Dinosaurs or Diego. I am leaning toward dinosaurs... but if I don't do Sesame Street this year, I'll never get to do one again. And it is so cute, and Wywy really loves Elmo, Ernie and Cookie - and Grover and Zoe, too. And, he's 2, so it's really up to me.
I think it will come down to availability when I hit the Party Store. We'll see. I'm sure you'll see considerably more as Labor Day actually kicks off "Entertaining Season" here at 131. And I really love that!