The Raft

Being a mom can be very hard.
Today I took my kids to the pediatrician. Wyatt, because I decided he needed an allergy test. He has very bad eczema, pukes a lot and has tracheomalacia which has never bothered me (or him) on it's own, but coupled with the other 2 things and that he doesn't seem to be outgrowing any of it, I decided it was time.
So - that means that the little guy had to have blood drawn. A big needle inserted into his arm and left their, moved around a bit to jostle the blood out, and then pulled back out. Then, done again, in the other arm, because that first arm stopped giving blood and better to keep him crying than to have to bring him back and make him cry again.
So - hopefully this test, as high level as it is, will point us towards something that is bothering my little guy so we can cut it out of his life and make him happier. :)
Abby - she has not been letting me clean her right ear. No biggie, I just chalked it up to the fact that it's annoying but I asked the doc to check it out, just in case.
Sure enough - there's something lodged in there. So - when I was cleaning it I was pushing whatever that thing is deeper into her ear and causing her pain.
"That thing" could be a Barbie shoe, for all I know. Or (and I suspect this is it) it's a huge glob of wax that I pushed too deep when I was cleaning her ears.
See, my kids have wicked gross ears. Wyatt has never had an ear ache or infection, Abby has only ever had one. But the wax that I pull out of these kids' ears is leg-en-dary.
Anyway - she is going to an ENT tomorrow and I am looking forward to having a conversation about the kids' ears.
Anyway, before we decided she had to go to the ENT, Dr. R tried to remove the "foreign object" in the office. Abby cried. Hard. It broke my heart. And I could only hold her hand because I was also holding Wyatt. It was awful.
Fortunately, Abby recovers quickly with mention of lollipops, so she's over it now.
Man.
That was a tough morning.
Seeing your kids hurt is, by far, the most painful thing you will ever feel. And, from what I hear, that never goes away.

Let's lighten the topic, a bit, albeit not much - because I want to discuss something that can be a very touchy subject to some.
Christmas/Holiday cards.

Each year, I truly look forward to choosing the cards that we will send. Our list is long and as much as I try to whittle it down each year, I just can't. Some people on the list are people that we only talk to through Christmas cards. But that doesn't make them any less meaningful to me, I care about them, our lives are just busy.
So, each year I choose the cards we will send. Since we had kids we started including a picture of the kid(s), too. I tossed around the idea of doing a "Christmas Letter", too, but decided I didn't have much to say - most of the people who care about what I would write already know it all. So, I write out the cards, pop a picture in, lick it and write out the address. We print our own return-address labels, too, because the ones you get for free never spell our name right and why pay for them!?
Anyhoo - each year, Jay and I settle in together at the dining room table and go through the ritual. We add people, we take away people and we leave a few blank cards for the people that we will feel badly for forgetting once we receive their card.
And we receive a lot of cards, too. I honestly don't know if we send a lot because we receive a lot or if we receive a lot because we send a lot. We've been doing cards together since before we were married so it's too many seasons of giving and receiving to keep track.
When I receive a card, I love to see the pictures that people send. I save them all. I have every single picture of every single kid and I like to look at how they've grown over the years. (Sorry, I don't save the pics of the cats - lol).
So - here's the touchy part - do you write out your own card? Do you print address labels? Do you buy the pre-printed picture cards? Do you buy the pre-printed cards and stuff them into pre-printed envelopes? Where do you draw the line? When do you say "I don't enjoy this, I just do it cuz I have to and I will do it with as little effort as possible because this list of people are not worth my time anyway."
Don't get me wrong, I love the pictures.
I just wonder if the people even know they sent us one sometimes. Or did the computer just spit me out and they just stuffed the envelope, with no thought or consideration as to who is receiving what...
I enjoy the tradition of writing out our cards together because we laugh and chat and reflect on our list, on our previous holidays and on what we write or draw or think about with each card... and I just wonder if that is odd. Am I the only one? I don't view it as a chore, I love it. It's another fun part of the whole season...
So - when I get those pre-printed envelopes with pre-printed cards, I still hang them up and I still save the picture. But I don't always send a card back... because I don't think that person will notice one way or the other.