Recognition.

One of the struggles I have had as a stay-at-home-mom has been my occasional feeling that my work goes uncredited.  Like, even though I am exhausted at the end of the day/week/year, I have nothing to really show for it, nothing to "prove my worth".

I know you can easily come back at that statement with "your children being happy and healthy are the proof of your hard work"...  blah blah blah...  I would say the same thing to you if you were feeling down.  We all know that, some days it's just hard to feel that.

There is no one to blame for this feeling.  It is just a feeling, no one makes them happen.

My husband is amazingly supportive and loving.  He showers me with praise and adoration and he does not go unappreciated.  I thank him, too.  We are a good team.

Nonetheless, I have to admit that I am at times, at odds with my choice to give up "earning" for "caring".  

I care for the house, the kids, the husband, his career, the school and town stuff...  and I do care.  A lot.  And I take pride in my volunteer work, my involvement with the kids' school days, friends and activities.  

I have never had any intention of throwing myself into a new career once the kids "get bigger".  This is my career, this is my life.

Watching the stray kid here and there, subbing a few days a week at school, scouring sales for the best deals and never paying full-price - that is stuff I do to throw a little ching back into the pot sometimes...  I like doing those things.  Those things require little more of me than I am willing to give and those things are also voluntary.  If I get called to work at school I don't have to go.

My husband has to to go to work.  All the Time.

So, I don't complain.  Not too loudly.

We have had a few weekends when Mommy has had to disappear for several hours.  To the mall, to the gym, to Kohls - what have you.  Mommy needs solitude sometimes.

Then, along comes a day like today - Tuesday March 27th - and all of my worry and need for measure are sated.

Today was report card day.  And I am walking on air.  I am a sappy, goopy mess.

Pride.  Love.  Pride...  I am just a happy mama.

I know it's about them, not me - obviously I know that - but the pride I am getting from their progress far outweighs anything ever handed to me by a manager at any number of the jobs I have had in previous lives.  Words like "well liked by her classmates" and "a natural leader at play".  "25 out of 25" and "14 out of 14".  "Cooperative and Polite".  "Kind and Helpful".  "Fun".  "Energetic".  "Happy".

"Focused and Enthusiastic".

No percentage above average or salary increase ever made me beam and cry and just over-the-top melt in the way that these pieces of paper that came home today have.

So.  I'm doing something right.  I have been recognized, indirectly, for my diligence.  So, today - I will hold my head a bit higher, worry a bit less and hope that should the day come that a report card is anything less than fabulous, I don't hang myself by my own apron strings.