The Raft

When I was new to the Sales Desk at my previous occupation/job/company/career, I was quickly befriended by one (remaining nameless) woman.
She turned out to be a bit on the koo-koo side (as, I have learned, is often the case with "immediate friends") but I will remember one thing she said to me for a very long time.  It was 8 years ago (or so) and I still think about it, so it stands to reason it will stay with me.

"Don't be naive, Liz.  People disappoint you.  No matter what you do, they will let you down."

I don't remember why she said that to me.  I don't recall the conversation or the context or the mood.  Although I do recall that we were standing pretty much out in the open, in the aisles between the rows of cubicles, so it couldn't have been a deeply private or even lengthy discussion.

And I do recall that she was recently divorced, unhappily employed and pretty much a negative-nelly.

Regardless, that statement stuck with me.

Was I a bit too cheery?

Was my naturally positive spin irritating her a bit too much that day?

Was my newly married, house-hunting giddy-ness wearing on her last nerve?

Perhaps.

I remember thinking, at that moment and since then that my people do not disappoint me. 

I am never disappointed with my people.

And here I am, 8 years later, the age now that she was then (give or take).

Still happily married, 2 kids and in our second house (third home).  But I have been disappointed.  So, I have found myself thinking of her and her disappointments and how sad and angry it makes me that she was right.

People disappoint you.

Then, this week - after yet some more lengthy discussions with my husband and sisters- I came to realize something.

I can disappoint people.

I don't set out to do it.

Just the opposite, in fact.  I try to make my people happy.  I try to make my people feel my love and adoration, my support and friendship.

Sometimes I try too hard.  Sometimes I fail.

Maybe it's my method.  Maybe it's my angle.

Maybe it's because I don't worry about those things - and I just try to be a good person, doing good things, being happy and sharing my happiness.

Maybe it's because I find my life is happier and simpler because I accept people for who they are and not what I wish they would be.

Maybe it's because even though I say that, I don't always do it, even though I want to and try to.

I don't know.  But I have learned something from trying to figure it out:

I don't know.  And I might not ever know.

You simply cannot please everyone all the time and sometimes - you can never please someone.

I accept that.

And I love, anyway.

Do you?