The Raft

They Won't Fall until They Do.
Sounds stupid, right? When Abby was a baby, my mom kept saying that to me and I kept telling her that was stupid. I won that one; Abby never fell off of anything. But. Let's face it. She never tried to move very quickly.
Wyatt, on the other hand, he has proven my mother right about 8 times over. And I actually found myself giving Michele the same line of bullshit recently. Wyatt has fallen off of his changing table, out of Abby's bed, off of the couch in the living room. He is a climbing, crawling, sitting fool. His balance is excellent. Better than his sister's or either of his parent's, really. But he can't fly. Fortunately, he is a resilient little bugger. And his love for Woobie and his sister's stuffed Elmo run deep.

Stupid, Annoying Shit I Swore I would Never Say to a Pregnant Woman.
"You'll understand when you have children."
"So, you excited?"
"When I was pregnant... "
"Are you going to circumcise/breastfeed?"
"Don't bother buying/registering for ... You'll never use it."
"Get ready to never sleep again!"
"Your life is going to change in a way you cannot possibly understand."

Brilliant, Useful Shit I Will Continue to Offer, regardless of Being Asked.
"No matter how dark and lonely your sleepless nights are, they don't last very long and whether you realize it now or later, you will miss them."
"Every stage finishes up before the next one begins. Don't sweat it, it won't last."
"Take the Pain Meds."
"Nurse. It's cheaper and you don't need to carry a diaper bag."
"Let your husband get to know his child. Try to remind yourself every day that your baby is also your husband's baby."


I Have Turned into Christine.
I spent a good part of my life doing everything in my power to make her life miserable. Then, I wasted a bunch of time just being annoyed with her all of the time. Now, 32 and saddled with a husband and 2 kids, I realize that we are the same woman. Perhaps that explains the years of torture.


I Haven't Been to the Mall in 2 Months.
Maybe you didn't know this but I love the mall. I mean, I love the mall like some people love sports teams. But, I spend too much money in the mall. It is truly a hobby of mine. So, I promised my husband that I would stop going for the summer. And that includes Evergreen Walk. No Shopping All Summer. I miss the mall, Abby misses the carousel and I would be willing to bet that some of those store ladies miss our credit cards.
Christmas Time cannot come Soon enough.

The Quarterly card Game. It is a mystery how the 6 of us got here. Really.