The Raft

We've covered this topic before.
I'm fat.

There are people who need to lose, like 10 pounds and there are people who are roly-poly obese.
I fall somewhere in the middle.

My friends will say "Oh you're not fat!  You're so tall/curvy/big-boobed/proportioned/solid/gorgeous!"
(ok, I added the last one)
But, friends, while I appreciate your love and kindness, the facts IS the facts.

But, this is my decade.
I am turning it around.

High Fiber, Lots of Protein, fresh fruits and veggies, Lean meats and Fish.  And when push comes to shove - Smartones Desserts.

And.....  *drumroll*  .......
Exercise.

So, this morning I woke up, got dressed, got the kids dressed, packed my gym bag, dropped one kid off at school and brought the other one down to the health club with me.  He was a very big, brave boy going into childcare all by himself.  The cars, trucks, trains, tracks, roads and ramps help.
I walked and then actually got the speed up to jog a bit on the treadmill.  I want to jog outside when spring comes.  I want to want to and that means I have to get myself in shape and "road ready" over the next few months.
The treadmill was just my warm up, though.  My purpose was Step Class.

I will skip ahead and make this long story slightly less long:  I will never...  EVER...  boast or even discuss the fact that I have a Wii Fit.  I will never tell anyone at the Club that I use the Wii Fit.  I will never - even in my own head (after this post) - consider the Wii Fit to be an actual form of exercise.  {Even the Yoga poses don't match up and that is pretty universal.  Nothing compares to actually "practicing yoga" in fluid, "finding the ease in the effort", group form.}
But the Step Class?  Compared to the Wii Step?  Well, they don't compare.

This class was 60 minutes.  I was sweating buckets, overheated and red and on the verge of collapse after 20 minutes.  I finally had the courage to stop and go get a drink of water, regroup and get back in there after about 25 minutes.  And I straight up stopped trying to follow the instructor and began my own sort of "cool down" after about 35 minutes.
If you've ever seen an aerobics instructor - a tiny, strong, tight, perky-but-a-little-mean woman - multiply her by 7000 and that was the Jillian-Michaels-bot leading this class.

I liked her.  I loved the class.  And, after a few weeks I am sure I will be keeping up and loving it for the entire 60 minutes.
But today - I cried.  I almost puked but I definitely cried.  {In the shower, not in the class!}
I had intended to leave after 45 minutes so that I could shower, grab Wyatt and get back to pick Abby up from school on time but I had no idea how badly I would want and need to leave at 40 minutes!

It was an eye-opening experience.  I am very out of shape and overweight.  But I am committed and enthusiastic.
And, fortunately, I possess the self-confidence to forge through the part of this that makes me look like an asshole to get to the other side.
And, fortunately, the Club we joined seems full of people ready to encourage and support me (and each other) on this journey.
A few women gave me great words of support, joked about their first classes and cheered me on to come back next week.  It made me feel better.  And what's cooler than women empwering women?  I love to feel that sisterhood.  And it was loud and clear today.

So, tomorrow I will try Zumba.
And next week I will try Step Class again.

And maybe, just maybe, I will not worry about how jiggly I am as I chase Wyatt across the beach this summer.